The AutoTech exchange

The room across the hall

Let the Department of Self-Aggrandizment clear some things up for you. First, the ratings themselves are a cumulative effort (there is no Minister) and great care is taken in its production. We have sweated the details, chosen the nicknames, and been smugly pleased with our piercing wit. Do not expect to find an all-powerful despot in charge of these ratings. As for your more specific charges, we find them petty at best. A hand? That is hardly a glorious appearence in a magazine where editors freely flaunt their torsos and preening faces next to their favorite new wasteful automobile. We are willing to include mere outlines of the subject if obscured behind a windshield, but sorry, no unattached limbs will suffice. You don’t have to own a magazine in order to shove a protuberance in front of the camera as a picture is being taken.

But do not despair. Your diligence will not go unrewarded. In the face of these new developements, we are starting a new file for self-aggrandizing memos. We hope you will be as prolific here as you are elsewhere.

Thank you.